Lies in Love

What if I told you "I love you"
What would it mean if I lied?

I will not live a lie with you
I will not live a life with you

You deserve better
You don't deserve me

I sit and look at life
I sit and wonder why

Why did I say it?
Why did I speak false words?

They don't match my thoughts.
They don't align with my soul.

Love is said when it's not true.
Love is spoken from me to you.

The day goes by without us saying hi.
The day ends with me saying goodbye.

I walk off into the fading sunset.
I walk away from your blank face.

You said you loved me.
You never loved me.

I tell myself this to feel better.
I tell myself this to feel something.

I said I loved you.
I maybe loved you.

Lies I tell you.
Lies I tell myself.

My feet follow each other.
My soul follows the air.

People laughing from a few blocks away.
People living a life that is not mine.

Am I happy?
Am I content?

Yes.
No.

I smile at small things.
I am dissatisfied with everything.

Love is a feeling rarely felt.
Love is a feeling completely made up.

We were not meant to be.
We were only a memory.

I read to escape.
I read to feel safe.

I do not read romance novels.
I do read real life novels.

The stars come out as the earth falls asleep.
The stars I cannot see though they do comfort me.

Love is what we consume.
Love is what we sell.

The day I broke you heart.
The day I read a book.

Why do I feel the pain?
Why do I feel the same?

I put the book down and begin to cry.
I stain the words with drops from my eyes.

You fell for my lies.
You were sweet and kind.

I will miss small moments with you.
I will miss laughing with you.

What if I told you "I love you"
What would it mean if I lied?